Archive for the ‘Events’ Category

Have you ever been in a situation where you weren’t sure what to do when it came to business etiquette?

I recently met with a Sydney rapport building and business etiquette expert, Lady Danielle Di-Masi of Next Business Leaders http://www.nextbusinessleaders.com. My aim in meeting her was to find out if that she had some good advice and ideas and was interested in presenting them at a future Leading Ladies event for business women.

Now let me tell you if ever I’ve felt nervous about acting appropriately this was one time, before I even eye balled her I wondered if I was dressed appropriately for the meeting and what I should do as a greeting – a courteous nod and greeting, a hand shake – and if so how strong?

What do you do in situations like this? Are you familiar enough with your clients and colleagues to hug them, or do you prefer a more formal handshake? Where do you put your napkin when you need to go to the ladies room and do you announce to the table where you are going with a bubbly “I’m just off to the loo”?

It seems there are so many rules out there, and if you’re like me and travel the world you may find it even more daunting as other cultures bring an added layer of complexity to business etiquette. On this day I needn’t have worried so much – upon meeting Lady Danielle as I felt immediately at ease and we built a rapport quickly and effortlessly. It helped that she pointed out that many people are nervous meeting her for the first time and get all wooden and tongue tied wondering if she is judging their behaviour. Her advice was that when you are confident with the basics of business etiquette and appropriate behaviours that you are then able to concentrate on the important things at the function or meeting you are attending such as the purpose of your meeting, what you are there to achieve and who the other person is.

My advice: take a deep breath and relax. You can’t possibly be expected to know all the rules and if you are gracious and humble people will accept that you may not know what is expected from you in a particular situation. And there are some basic etiquette niceties that if you get them right will help them all to get through your working life without too much cause for embarrassment. Lady Danielle made a great point during our conversation that etiquette simply means that you know what is appropriate behaviour in certain times and situations. And this can be very important as you grow and build your business, expand your networks and build a base of people who know, like and trust you.

To hug or to handshake, that is the question

My gut instinct to hugging a business associate is no, and the etiquette expert agrees. In her view there is no need to touch your business associate, ever, because even if one of the people in the meeting is a very close friend it could make the other meeting attendees uncomfortable. In the privacy of your own office with your own team members I’ll leave any decisions about the appropriateness of displays of affection to you. I have been known to hug an employee when they achieved something amazing and I have hugged a client before after they had been through an amazing, emotional breakthrough in a session and needed some additional support as they were leaving the office. However I also am very clear about my professional boundaries and I am very sure these moments were not misconstrued for anything else. While I believe in connecting in an authentic way in business, in our current litigious society I would be cautious about any forms of touching.

Step away from the napkin…

Picture yourself at a networking lunch or dinner where you need to get up for a moment from the table. Napkin etiquette is simple, place it neatly on your chair and excuse yourself. Resist the urge to share intimate details on where you are going; people can guess! When you return to the table, place the napkin straight back on your lap. When you are finished eating at the end of the meal, place the napkin on the left of your plate, not on the plate.

I learnt a lot just in the hour I spent with Lady Danielle – I hope these little pointers give you some food for thought when next you are at a business function. Most importantly remember, you are your brand and how people experience you and your company comes across in everything you say and do and don’t do. Your behaviour influences the way people perceive you, your company, and its value. Be gracious and humble and be on brand, whatever that means for you.